By Michelle L’amour

You’ve got it! Now flaunt it!

This is a very interesting time we are living in. We are getting stronger by the day and yet, there is still so much work to do! We are getting mixed messages through the media, and I think it’s time we started paying attention to the healthy message of body positivity.

We are all different shapes and sizes. And thank goodness! How boring would it be if we were all the same? Imagine a dinner with friends and everything on the table was the same color, shape and taste? Snooze.

The message of body positivity is out there but it’s getting clouded. We are told to be confident and beautiful, but the same people who are telling us to be confident are then making some remark about their boobs not being big enough in the very next breath! I’ve seen it time and time again on shows like “The View” & “Rachel Ray” (Yes, I’m a showgirl and I keep night hours).  How confusing for an onlooker. If we’re going to talk the talk, we also need to walk the walk. We all know that walking is the hardest part.

Here’s what I know: It’s hard being a woman. I have struggled with lasting self- confidence and negative self talk for a long time. I say “lasting self-confidence” because my opinion about myself would rise and fall in direct proportion to my waist size, the number of likes on a post, the amount of money I had or the gigs I booked. That does not make me proud to admit that, but I’m doing so because I know there are more of you out there just like me.

Just because I take my clothes off for a living doesn’t necessarily mean that my confidence is off the charts. It’s getting there though through the efforts of monitoring my self-talk and also weaning myself off of bad influences. I don’t know about you, but a few moments on Instagram and FB can really take a toll on my mood. So, I try to limit myself. I get in, I get out. I like a few things at the top of the page and that’s it!

I’ve realized that I’ve always been the type that believes more in others than myself. I’ve had a little bit of a blind spot when it came down to self-reflection. I think that’s a very common situation for most people. It’s hard to accurately access yourself and we can easily believe the negative around us, rather than the positive. Why? I don’t know. When I figure that out, I’ll write another post!

Now, the saying usually goes ‘IF you’ve got it, flaunt it,’ but I’m thinking that you’ve already got it. There are no ‘ifs,’ ‘ands’, or ‘buts’ (unless they’re BUTTS) about it! The trick is to teach your body to move in ways that exude confidence. Sit up straight. Walk with your head up. Let your hips sway. These are eye-catching behaviors. Eventually, the physical attributes of confidence will internalize. It’s like that famous line from Boiler Room: “Act as if…”

If you work on the physical projection of confidence in conjunction with a healthy internal practice of self love and compassion, you will begin to transform. Rest assured that all the pieces you need for this are already there. You’ve got it all! No need to wait. I don’t want you saying, ‘Well, I’ll do this after I answer this email,’ or ‘I’ll get started after I’m done taking care of everyone else’ or ‘I can’t do this until I have my eyelash extensions.’ No darling, the time is now.
A confident woman is unstoppable and devastatingly sexy. Happy flaunting!